YOU ARE A GIRL THEREFORE.....
I have over the years growing up come to somewhat resent being a girl because it would seem this gender is burdened with the survival of all sexes. I cant tell you how many times I was told and have heard other people being told to learn a skill or behave a particular way because they are a "girl". Now I would not have a problem with this if it wasn't that the context is always related to your ability to therefore attract a boy. Never though have I heard, you are a boy, therefore, reference. Boys are allowed more self determination than girls are.
Girl- a female human species
Female-An individual of the sex which conceives and brings forth young, or (in a wider sense) which has an ovary and produces ova.
Society has managed to heap what i consider an unnecessary burden on the girl child and take away her freedom to self determine and these are some of the ways that i find to be totally unreasonable and I will share with you the practical reasons why.
1. You are a girl therefore you must know how to cook and clean the house. Fair enough I must know how to keep my surroundings clean and be able to feed myself. But why must this responsibility be the girl child's alone? What must become a boy who cannot clean his surroundings and feed himself? Are we condemning our brothers to hunger and filth? I for one care too much about them to allow this stereotype to be perpetuated at least in my family.
2. You are a girl therefore you must look good and be beautiful to be desired. I am bothered by the fact that we don't necessarily encourage the boys to do anything about their appearance so we also find them attractive. Why is it that society has allowed the men to think they can get away with looking unkept and still manage to score themselves a pretty girl? Well one might say because they are busy making money to attract the said females- well females also have the capacity and ability to make money, what then?
3. You are a girl therefore you can't be drinking lagers and whiskies and smoking. Well last I checked, no company has come out with a product made for any particular sex. It would be in their worst interest anyway as women make up the most of the world population. These imposed societal expectations based on ridiculous notions of what it means to be a proper 'girl'/ woman are just a great way to limit women's self exploration and expression.
I mean even in the relatively advanced society we live in where we recognise the need to have all people being educated for the girl child society has still managed to link it to a man.
4. You are a girl therefore you must get yourself a 'decent' education so that you may find a man. "Men these days don't want an uneducated woman". I resent here not the notion of getting an education but the association with getting a 'proper' man. Why aren't girls in our society just being taught to get educated so that they may be able to be contributing individuals to the economy and be able to sustain themselves?
5. You are a girl therefore you mustn't fight or be muscular. What will the men think of you? No man wants to have another male looking like person as a partner. Well if the same said men are the ones violating us and abusing us, isn't it in our best interests that we train our bodies and learn how to fight so that we are ready with the technique and the strength to be able to counter such attacks on our bodies from them?
6. You are a girl you must not be too loud! Don't laugh like that it is not attractive. Well, I have no scientific proof but I do believe that tones differ and voice pitches are something we are born with. You could try and train yourself to speak softer, but why waste time on that when you could be learning more practical skills that can help advance you economically, education wise or in business? Laughs are laughs- I am waiting to see the handbook that has the laws on laughing because otherwise my raucous laugh stays. Its very fun to laugh freely and loudly.
The last and final one;
7. You are a girl therefore you must get married and have kids. Chimamanda put this one to bed nicely for me when she said, the girl child is taught to aspire to a family and marriage and the boy child isn't and that already creates an imbalance in the kind of relationships that are formed between the two sexes! I mean being a girl child does not mean you have the emotional agility and maturity to bear and raise another human being, it does not necessarily mean you aspire to being Mrs somebody. Marriage as an institution should not be a desire because you are a girl but because you identify with the values it espouses. Children as well should not be something we have have because we have ovaries and wombs but they should be had by individuals with an ability and willingness to have them. Ability her ranges from the psychological to the economical.
Yes I am a girl. 10 points for stating the obvious but that does not subject me to anything that I do not identify with or that does not align with my spirit and give me peace.
You are a girl, therefore nothing.
I have over the years growing up come to somewhat resent being a girl because it would seem this gender is burdened with the survival of all sexes. I cant tell you how many times I was told and have heard other people being told to learn a skill or behave a particular way because they are a "girl". Now I would not have a problem with this if it wasn't that the context is always related to your ability to therefore attract a boy. Never though have I heard, you are a boy, therefore, reference. Boys are allowed more self determination than girls are.
Girl- a female human species
Female-An individual of the sex which conceives and brings forth young, or (in a wider sense) which has an ovary and produces ova.
Society has managed to heap what i consider an unnecessary burden on the girl child and take away her freedom to self determine and these are some of the ways that i find to be totally unreasonable and I will share with you the practical reasons why.
1. You are a girl therefore you must know how to cook and clean the house. Fair enough I must know how to keep my surroundings clean and be able to feed myself. But why must this responsibility be the girl child's alone? What must become a boy who cannot clean his surroundings and feed himself? Are we condemning our brothers to hunger and filth? I for one care too much about them to allow this stereotype to be perpetuated at least in my family.
2. You are a girl therefore you must look good and be beautiful to be desired. I am bothered by the fact that we don't necessarily encourage the boys to do anything about their appearance so we also find them attractive. Why is it that society has allowed the men to think they can get away with looking unkept and still manage to score themselves a pretty girl? Well one might say because they are busy making money to attract the said females- well females also have the capacity and ability to make money, what then?
3. You are a girl therefore you can't be drinking lagers and whiskies and smoking. Well last I checked, no company has come out with a product made for any particular sex. It would be in their worst interest anyway as women make up the most of the world population. These imposed societal expectations based on ridiculous notions of what it means to be a proper 'girl'/ woman are just a great way to limit women's self exploration and expression.
I mean even in the relatively advanced society we live in where we recognise the need to have all people being educated for the girl child society has still managed to link it to a man.
4. You are a girl therefore you must get yourself a 'decent' education so that you may find a man. "Men these days don't want an uneducated woman". I resent here not the notion of getting an education but the association with getting a 'proper' man. Why aren't girls in our society just being taught to get educated so that they may be able to be contributing individuals to the economy and be able to sustain themselves?
5. You are a girl therefore you mustn't fight or be muscular. What will the men think of you? No man wants to have another male looking like person as a partner. Well if the same said men are the ones violating us and abusing us, isn't it in our best interests that we train our bodies and learn how to fight so that we are ready with the technique and the strength to be able to counter such attacks on our bodies from them?
6. You are a girl you must not be too loud! Don't laugh like that it is not attractive. Well, I have no scientific proof but I do believe that tones differ and voice pitches are something we are born with. You could try and train yourself to speak softer, but why waste time on that when you could be learning more practical skills that can help advance you economically, education wise or in business? Laughs are laughs- I am waiting to see the handbook that has the laws on laughing because otherwise my raucous laugh stays. Its very fun to laugh freely and loudly.
The last and final one;
7. You are a girl therefore you must get married and have kids. Chimamanda put this one to bed nicely for me when she said, the girl child is taught to aspire to a family and marriage and the boy child isn't and that already creates an imbalance in the kind of relationships that are formed between the two sexes! I mean being a girl child does not mean you have the emotional agility and maturity to bear and raise another human being, it does not necessarily mean you aspire to being Mrs somebody. Marriage as an institution should not be a desire because you are a girl but because you identify with the values it espouses. Children as well should not be something we have have because we have ovaries and wombs but they should be had by individuals with an ability and willingness to have them. Ability her ranges from the psychological to the economical.
Yes I am a girl. 10 points for stating the obvious but that does not subject me to anything that I do not identify with or that does not align with my spirit and give me peace.
You are a girl, therefore nothing.
RAWLY said..Indeed this is the reality that stands OUT in our country,the oppression that's hidden behind "O Mosadi, itsee jaana,, O ngwana wa mosetsana, dira jaana" This is the hypocrisy preached by the church and elders at home.you say so much truth it cuts really deep.
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