DATING

Why do we date? What are our ultimate expectations and do we voice them to our partners? How do we determine the right person to take it to the next step with. Is it because of what we know of them? But what do we make of the dynamic nature of humans and the potential of what we know of the person changing? My friends say I am a difficult person to date, I say I am realistic. I notice the little things and I don’t like ignoring them because all too often when people divorce or fall out of love/ like it's because of the little things that their partner does that they just can't stomach anymore that they thought they could ignore. I don’t get why people would make the sacrifice of dating someone they are not comfortable with or around. The reality is no one will ever find their 100% other half without flaws, after all we are perfect in our imperfections, but I do not believe in forcing things. I for example know what matters to me and any relationship I have must accommodate these things. I am not entirely unreasonable, I can compromise but I am not at all for losing the essence of what makes me, me for a relationship. I also abhor wasting my time or the other person's time and I think that’s why people end up saying after dating a long time and it not working out that they wasted time. I don’t believe in wasting time, if I am with you then I must be enjoying something about us being together. Why then do people, at least the one's I have met subject themselves to relationships they do not cherish and therefore do not enjoy nor more importantly respect!? Why should we as people be content with not being happy with ourselves or our relationships? I mean I get  that a relationship is work and for some things you guide your partner on how to make you happy, but for christ's sake there has to be a natural pull towards each other, the work done must definitely build on something, an attraction, an understanding, a commonality, anything. My main case here is that no one should have to over compromise themselves if they are with the right person. It leads to bitterness and holding of grudges and counting up times and not living in the moment and enjoying the moment. Sometimes taking time to yourself and being with oneself is what one needs to gain perspective on themselves, what they like and don’t like so that in their being whole and their authentic self, they are able to attract likeminded people and be able to maintain themselves in the union.